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JAMES' PERSONAL WRITINGS: SLOVING
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9.08.2020

The death of the mission?

 Turns out that the axle of the trailer is a massive Achilles heel, and so far getting it right has eluded us. Getting the alignment right has been impossible so far and several weeks ago work introduced a weakness that only now are we detecting twice in the last two days the axle Has Broken. We're about to get towed 30 miles back to the shop that last worked on it. They seem to really care and are going to take another crack at getting it right. Bleeding to death financially. But of the 46th state goal at least we've done 40 so far, Illinois being 39.

Update. Well, we survived the tow, great guy, I'm optimistic that the guys when they can schedule me in around the big trucks will Implement something that will hold this time but if not we're probably done. This has been a really really  dark juncture. Whatever Creator wants.

3 Day Facebook jail seems to have just ended. My guess is that they don't like my stances regarding Israel and are looking for any excuse to shut me down. You might want to subscribe to this blog page. Or book Mark it.









9.06.2020

The most honest among us maybe the Trump supporters. The least hypocritical.

 In saying that Trump is protecting America that is true. America has always been racist in fact and function. It has always been based on oppression at home and abroad. Trump is Trump is heroically fighting to protect every aspect of that out in the open. Out in the open is the grotesque Park at the surface but what is really grotesque is that both the Liberals and the Democrats of any power of any means have faced their lives and continue to base their lives and promised to continue basing their lives on that hideousness. Trump's crime in the prime of his supporters is him being so blatant about it. Voice typing while riding.

FB says I'm suspended for 3 days

 For sharing this


7.29.2020

Unposted voice log mostly cycling.

Link to files here. I assume that they play, let me know if they don't. The last week has really been a tremendous Revelation in terms of cycling. Huge breakthrough.

6.21.2020

Warning, cycling. Yesterday's euphoric log seems to have been an unintended trap.

Everything in it may be correct but the emphasis was disaster oh, well, a really really really unproductive difficult day with very low metrics. At all these things been subordinate to what I think is actually the Holy Grail, keeping 99% of the focus on savouring contributing energy efficiently in a circular manner, roiling manner, every inch of travel, every millimeter of travel, has everything been subordinate to that then maybe it would have been good. More to learn today.

6.20.2020

James was asked, is the generator working out? His reply: It's....


James was asked, is the generator working out? His reply: It's.... a game changer. Many weeks I won't use it at all maybe many months, but when weather is really bad or long distance is required it is a tremendous asset. Also horribly heavy and I damaged my back this morning but maybe it was a warning in time.... and without it, and they're does not really seem to be a suitable

6.19.2020

Cycling update, important. Log. The roiler is at the perineum , Rollin...

Cycling update, important. Log. The roiler is at the perineum , Rollin... g through each transition, gently engaged 100% of the time period the holy Grail? I think so.

Item. Looking for improvement James has not been in these last 3 months or so. Although not perfect it has been a wonderful plateau meeting every desired criterion from power to Freeing the mind for other work.

 Item. Yesterday however Gigantic new plat 2 seems to have been reached. Not possible without all of the advances that came together about 3 months ago entering Asheville.

Item. Important note. There is a tremendous backlog of Logs to be transcribed and posted on these last 3 months. Hopefully soon.

Item. But this is too important not to post now.

Item. There is a Royler, it is at the perineum .

Item. Savoring delivery , contribution to, energy of the travel every nano 2nd, keeping this Royal are engaged.

Item. Of utmost importance I think, the key that unlocks this, is going for the internal roiling, not the external roiling on the periphery of the travel of the legs. This is a gentle instant re-engagement at each transition point.

Item. Royal or meaning chaos Rolling at the perennial M along with the up leg and the down leg 100% of the time period

Item. Rolling through the transition points.

Item. The output of this This is as Good as any other technique.

Item. Maybe the biggest problem is that it is so deceptively effortless, Tiring, but no stress, so fluid, that the body finds it difficult to believe that it is delivering the power that it is

Item. Extremely valuable update. At the top of the perineum that is the part of the front of him up toward the belly button. Other anatomical Parts could be mentioned but that's too gross. This really really help keep things in balance and further discourage the attempt to go for engagement with the periphery rather than within the Royal order itself.

Ite Long ago the notion of  jogging or trotting speed Cadence  was a flushed  but lost and forgotten.  It is back building on top of all this as a very nice thing.
 He's freezing points have not been spell checked. Traveling.
m.

Item. Update. Light on the feet and smooth on the feet extremely important. Such a useful indicator of things going well or things going bad. James has a tremendous tendency to panic and everything gets jerky and forcing and power goes to hell and exhausting goes through the roof. Attending to the feet fact that there's no punching going on but rather light on the feet and feet hanging from the pedals are tremendously useful.

Tremendously important and forgotten for much of yesterday. Every part of the journey each day each hour each minute is habit forming oh, good or bad. So difficult to bring to mind given exhaustion or distraction put so easy to implement, and very brief and it pays such huge dividends.

It may be that a problem with yesterday which was a good day, but a problem was that James bought two start the royal or at very fast RPM. It may be the fishes like a sprinter going right into a Sprint from a cold start in the morning without first warming up. that's certainly James prevailing Theory...

6.18.2020

Major update. Assuming that the generator Works which will be known within the next hour or so, will very shortly....


Major update. Assuming that the generator Works which will be known within the next hour or so, will very shortly.... find out if we can handle a covid 19, climate destroyed, world. We might be too heavy. We might be way too heavy now with the generator and several gallons of gasoline oh, and four gallons of water which is a lot of additional weight. But with the miraculous help provided by Phyllis Ann Salomone Collins and Alan McCormick, and some other Strokes of luck, the trailer is physically fortified, the axle assembly repaired and fortified, The Hub Motors are now carrying most of that trailer weight and the vehicle there for is infinitely less fragile than it was. Countless countless unimaginable hours of work going into upgrading the vehicles Electronics, wiring, waterproofing, Etc over recent months. If we'll ever be ready to handle this decreased Sun because of climate destruction, and non availability of convenient plug in power sources, fast food restaurants, we're about to find out. I am not pessimistic, but what will be will be. Oh, and self-sufficiency food-wise in terms of preparation. Between the instapot which is tremendously energy efficient for preparing meals, and a small collapsible kettle which is even more efficient for preparing breakfast including tea infuser, not only are meal expenses cut, quality of food somewhat increased, but also packaging dramatically reduced.  And animal kill dramatically reduced, largely vegan now but I can control what food is available to me. The road ahead. The mountains of the Blue Ridge Parkway expected to be beautiful but challenging, and Skyline Drive, are the next leg toward the southern tip of Maine, then if weather and time permits we'll sweep West for the remaining States hoping to pick up California for the winter, Lone Pine would be nice, particularly if I can find some remote long-term place where it is legal for me to stay more than a couple of weeks. 46 States is now the plan, it is not expected that the effort will be made to pick up Delaware and Rhode Island. Practical we are, purists we are not. The purpose remains to be what you said we can in terms of Awakening souls in the occasional encounter through the country. If we think of a more intense way of possibly doing that will do that. This being the alternative my soul gave me two going right away to one of the camps where we nice white Christian Americans are torturing and destroying thousands of children desperate for safety from countries we've destroyed, by burning myself alive at one of them too express my infinite grief, and rage.. That may eventually happen, or not, but certainly this attempt to complete 46 States comes first.



6.04.2020

Cycling blog long overdue. Recap of the last 2 months by speaking of today.


Item. Savoring and Treasuring 100% energy Extraction and investment every inch of travel. Allowing not any second to escape without making an energy contribution. It is a wonderful thing. Not intuitive But very natural when the body keeps in it mind. Update. A round dish sort of object emerged again today about 2 inches toward the groin from the knee. And what was most helpful to implement this item was to allow no instant when there was not upward action by the thigh complimented by downward action by the other thigh exiting a rolling energy on that object.

Item. Adding power with 100% Engagement 100% of the time summoning power rather than attempting to periodically force . Summoning power is a Conceptual sort of thing. Requires considerable faith but today that doesn't mean a lot of mental effort. Just keeping it in mind. This is a natural partner with this 1st point above. Savoring Every inch of travel as an opportunity to feel contribution of energy and when more or less energy is required attempting that within the constant velocity cadence of the moment by summoning additional power or energy Every fraction of an inch of travel

item through Every other element of the last 2 months is it play. Probably largely unconscious today.

Item. Thee feet and therefore the legs weight are hanging on the pedals which is Ana notion of rest and also correlates with the proper Relaxation Virtual limpness of the lower legs from the Upper part of the shin forward All the way through the toes.

Item. Constant velocity stare step.

Item. Note. The metrics for this 1st day of resumed travel are certainly respectable. at 212 watts per hour.

Item. Note. The experience of power is in the thighs and as far as the Part of the thighs closest to the knee. If James tries to explain it it is not unlike the cute nursing action of a cat's paws but James is reaching for that. but that's what it's like. 

5.23.2020

After many covid wks I caught a glimpse of home this morning. My life is of by and for the 10 in a million parched Souls.

To this post above, a friend said, I didn't know you had it!

My reply. psychologically, yes, I have let the world's covid obsession be mine. It was a painful and I think necessary Divergence from my work for the 10 in a million, but maybe I can resume my work now.

5.07.2020

My life, my adulthood, is extreme cycles.....

My life, my adulthood, is extreme cycles.....



For months on end I will plunge into a situation, probably dangerous and frightening, to embody it as best I can and therefore come to know it, and eventually my nervous system takes Mercy, my soul, and begins to make sense of it for me enough that I can try and be of some help, some use.

I view these last week's in that way. I'm lost. I'm plunged in and I'm not yet finding my footing. None of this is a complaint, it is a report. The pandemic is a societal coma, or global coma, and my nervous system is trying to come to grips with it. I am not certain that I'm using my time in the way I can to best serve. But it is the best I know and I am trying to claw forward. Spending many many hours a day trying to digest the unfolding Horrors in the world in the hopes that I can begin to find a way forward.

Yesterday I remembered from many weeks past that my mission had been and probably should continue forward, pioneering joy in material hell, for future survivors. I will not be amazed if that is the tow rope that helps me pull out of this quicksand to a place of helpfulness.

My response throughout my adulthood to seeing new catastrophe is to attempt to figure out how to be a catalyst for solution. That reflex has taken charge of my life in the midst of the covid-19 virus and the much more deadly virus that it makes increasingly clear, human selfishness raised to Supreme religion as evidenced in those on the right in this country and the world. And I do not personally regret the pain and difficulty for me in these recent weeks, where I have felt so lost, but I think that I am realizing that I have been lost in the notion that things can be saved which I had several years ago I thought put behind me, facing that they are not going to be saved. And they are not going to be saved.

But I guess I needed this recent weeks of immersion to see that. Again.

And not just the immersion in the horror, many hours every day, and the lockdown, removing me from all physical activism that was my life. But major limbo for my partner, this wonderful vehicle. Weeks and weeks of trying to design a final major upgrade to remove the drivetrain from the tremendous danger zone within which it has existed, bearing twice or more of the weight that it should bear. And the world experts in Vancouver have been slowed to a glacial Pace by the virus. But last night I received this photograph of the almost completed components which may be shipped on Friday arriving first half of next week.

If that transpires and the installation goes successfully then my general sense is that within a month and possibly sooner the Voyage to complete the 48 states will resume.



5.03.2020

I may have just lost another really really dear friend. Not to the virus I think. Just to me. Clueless.


Log update: I thrive on feeling accountable. Feeling accountable helps me....



I thrive on feeling accountable.

Feeling accountable helps me... stay on track to have the high level of meaning that makes life worth living for me.

This does not mean that I make myself accountable to others approval. Never. I am accountable to the highest conception of being a contributing human being that I can muster. I'm never allowed to delegate that judgment to anyone else, but I consider at least in my mind what others are thinking, and certainly any and all appropriate and put that I can receive.

How is James spending these recent weeks where his friends are so lavishly affording him a safe and beautiful place 2 shelter in place until things open up from the virus?

I suppose there would be nothing wrong if James were using this for entertainment, Recreation, relaxation, but none of those are ways that James and Joyce spending his time, not since he was a misguided kid. That's just him. Maybe. 

These recent weeks he's devoting all of his time, all of his waking moments, on some combination of the following:

  • Trying to make sense of what the f*** is going on in the world, and sharing those insights that come to him that he finds insightful that might be useful to others. Facebook is the primary communication vehicle he is using.
  • Trying to deal with the internal storms that our dystopian external world can trigger within him such that he is as much of a Lsgiabeing.com moment-to-moment as he can be, as he understands that to be the major contribution that he can make to the world, that any of us can make to the world.
  • Working to maintain some reasonable level of capacity within the human motor and energy storage that his body has become over these years so that when the virus lifts and he can resume his mission physically it has not degraded too far. This is translating into 4 hours or so of intense cycling every other day.
  • Being a friend to the heroic mom of two teenage boys that are on the autism spectrum, physically located in Michigan, that he met briefly years ago when the trailer was being built there, that he continues to view as one of the most high performance Souls that has ever encountered. By way of analogy, if she were a heroic pilot of an airplane flying through, flying herself and her two children, through a hurricane that otherwise couldn't be escaped, and James could provide some ground Support Services, he would do so. He is doing so. It is a great privilege, and sometimes it takes a tremendous amount of time. Which he is Overjoyed to supply. A great privilege.
  • Long overdue maintenance and planning and execution of a gigantic final upgrade to this wonderful solar RV bicycle. The gigantic Achilles heel has always been the drive system which has been way underpowered and way over stressed for this 1200 lb payload. With the supplier in Canada of the two additional Motors crippled by the virus the process of determining what was appropriate order has been arduous. Three or four agonizing weeks were otherwise it could have been three or four days. Hopefully the components will arrive within the next 10 days or so at which point a local welder hopefully will execute the work needed so that James can to get it all installed. And what work he can do to prepare the vehicle for that is doing.
That probably puts forth 90% or so of how I'm spending my time. James

4.21.2020

Financial Rapids ahead for this Mission. Heads up. Several of you have indicated that you are committed to helping this Mission financially.

James is probably going to plunge this Mission into dangerous Financial Waters where it is not been for many months now. Two weeks ago and tomorrow major investment in an infected tooth, the extraction being tomorrow hopefully. Hopefully affordable at a community health clinic. The pain is saying not to let this go on any longer.

Another other issue is the ongoing pain with this wonderful vehicle. Forever there has been far too much stress on the current mechanical and electrical system in that rear drive wheel. It is a constant source of Maintenance and expense and breakage and damage and catastrophic risk. Also although the vehicle has enough power it does not have enough traction for those times that a camping spot needs to be reached on a off pavement, gravel or packed dirt road and with the dystopia we're headed into this is likely to be more and more frequently essential. So within a week it may well be that James will plunge into the major expenditure of putting two Motors in the rear trailer wheels.

And his portal on the world, his cellphone, the refurbished that he got a year ago, well he finally cracked the screen and that was a major expenditure today to get repaired.

So for those that do not want to see this Mission die prematurely from lack of financial funds James does not see an immediate need for your help. But it is likely that all of the cushion that he's been able to establish will be gone within several weeks and if there are any other blows then your help might make the difference between survival and not.

Cycling this vehicle with the idea of keeping the crankshaft turning is quite miserable. Cycling it with the idea of doing as large a share of energy every inch as I can is quite wonderful and automatic. I owe more posts on this. True for many weeks now.


4.05.2020

I'm taking the luxury afforded me today to sequester in a cave and try and get my bearings, to find my footing, in this new dystopian world.


More generally: Did you ever see the movie Hunger Games? How the sponsors would in Desperate situations sometimes reach in and provide help? This 48th state attempted Journey began in July, one person reached out and said hey, when you're in North Carolina, please come stay with us? Well the journey reached N. Carolina within a day or so of them being shut down for the virus. And my friends seem glad to have me Sheltering in place here. What are the chances?

Those times that you feel you have everything under control, are the times that you least do. Soul in charge never has that illusion. Nor gives it.


The insane, manic, premium we place on physical life is killing us. This virus is an opportunity for us to learn. " I'm not scared of dying and I don't really care…"


"... Give me my freedom for as long as I be
All I ask of living is to have no chains on me
All I ask of living is to have no chains on me,
And all I ask of dying is to go naturally, only want to go naturally…. ". Link

There is much that I agree with in this song, and much that I don't.

I do think that it is a religion in our culture to trade our life 4 pulse. And thereby we choose living death.

For some of us this virus can be a rebirth opportunity to break the death grip that are fear of physical mortality has on us.

4.01.2020

Thousand percent better day than yesterday.

Yesterday was really really tough. Sol desperately ill with no diagnosis or certainty of rolling again.
The crashing in of the horror of trump and this virus and the world going to hell.
But slow and steady internal and external work, the vehicle is rolling again, not at full health but rolling and that's huge. And some help from the factory in Canada and maybe even a positive resolution on a new motor that has gone bad. For the photograph above those are magnets they should be in a straight line instead they have migrated into this wave Arrangement, faulty glue apparently.
And with a lot of internal work and mustering all of my resources and knowledge I'm climbing out of the abyss and back into attempting to be a contributing soul in the world.