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JAMES' PERSONAL WRITINGS: SLOVING
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12.20.2021

It's frustrating, but I have to accept it, right now I'm doing everything....

It's frustrating, but I have to accept it, right now I'm doing everything






I can do, and there's just nothing extra. No extra time, no extra energy. Not complaining, but it's frustrating. Maybe I'll find it due to the month and a half or two months away from cycling, but I'm pretty horrified by how little energy I can contribute, and these are the shortest days of the year so the sun, no criticism, isn't giving me a whole lot of help. Starting tomorrow each day starts getting a little bit longer, but about a week out there's almost a week's worth of rain forecast. Oh well. Nothing compared to what the kids and grandkids and great grandkids have in store. And of course the millions and billions whose lives are already material hell due to our Western consumption, rape, plunder, of Mother Earth already on her deathbed.

12.15.2021

On one of the 10 shortest days of the year.

So while stationary when we can optimize the orientation of most of the panels toward the Sun 600 watts an hour on one of the 10 shortest days of the year. Awesome, and with pretty challenging Weather ahead really really important. But we spent most of the day traveling without the panels with such optimal orientation, and we were still generating 300 and 30 watts an hour. 2500w collected on the day.



 

12.14.2021

Such a privilege to be traveling with this vehicle.

 https://photos.app.goo.gl/uhtg1L3UZfwsBFTUA


Oh, and if you listen to the end it was a long long long long pause and then some expletives. Before the pause I thought I had stopped the video. Someone passed me and as they occasionally do they hung in the oncoming traffic lane forcing the oncoming car to almost stop. People are amazing. And rarely in a good way. Creator will not be sad to see us go.



11.24.2021

Khanh & my Sol is all but done. Hoping my friend will let me be a friend for a couple of weeks and then heading west.

Khanh & my Sol is all but done. Hoping my friend, brother, will let me be a good friend for the joy of it, for a couple of weeks and then heading west.


This was a miraculous vehicle that Khanh created six months ago. Miraculous upon arriving back here in Charlotte a month ago. But it is now beyond that. It was a nine months of the year solar vehicle not twelve, and now probably 11 or 12, even the short winter months for 30 or 50 miles a day of travel and cooking totally Off the Grid. Twice that the longer months.



 

It was an ergonomic catastrophe, a torture rack, really a fundamental design flaw for anyone serious about cycling aside from the one in a hundred that might perfectly fit the almost completely non-adjustable standard seat arrangement. That's behind us freeing possibly 3 4 5 hours a day of distraction on the part of James trying to figure out in that particular day how to enable his body to move this 800 lb object without totally destroying all his soft tissue. That's behind us. Truly an extraordinary leap. And so many other things I expect to detail in the next couple of days.

For a series of reasons including that Khanh has now freed up hours in every day that I'm traveling from the interesting nightmare of trying to work out the daily ergonomics.

What time I have had Beyond basic ergonomics in the last 6 months has been devoted centrally to more deeply understanding and incorporating the 300 versus that we have from the man Jesus that he probably spoke and lived. I never would have guessed earlier in my life that this is what I would want to devote myself to, but indeed it is. You are aptly named someone said recently, and another person said much the same, James, the brother of Jesus. It feels that way. The Deep Joy, and the sad responsibility.






And I expect that to continue, but I also have an inkling of what I will be studying in the hours per day that Khanh has freed up where I can have articles and books read to me.

What I think is most needed of me is to help make it easy for others to do good in the world for the Supreme, penultimate, Joy of it, the superior Joy of it. And as I have known and said for decades the reason that's hard, it is our basic nature, the reason it's hard, is because we're dying for examples in this near perfectly evil culture that we create and bask in. 

And this is why three years ago after realizing that there's no hope to avert Ecocide for the human and all species, I found myself creating this website, Lsgiabeing.com. At that time my sense was, James, you need to do the best you can to channel good Souls into the world, for the one in a million that might be helped by that, some poor soul way Downstream. 



But now I realize, you need to do it, James, for it to be easier for you to attempt good in the world, for the sheer Joy of attempting, even with the gop Nazi goon takeover and resultant hell that will happen in 2024.

And I expect, I might be wrong, I expect, that I'm now called to use my time while traveling returning to that joyful task with eyes more open, studying the great Souls at that site. With my understanding deeper. The huge insight being that doing good for the sake of doing good, ATTEMPTING GOOD, every breath, is the ultimate Joy regardless of the horrible material consequences that it may bring, or threatens to bring. I didn't have that clarity then, I do now.

Unless Greta goes on hunger strike....



11.22.2021

And now Sol has a proper seat

 And now, we have a proper seat, thanks to this incredibly generous, able, visionary engineer designer Builder Khanh Dam. Demonstrably there may be no one that appreciates the elf more than I do.  Or who uses it more seriously, certainly not many. It is an engineering Marvel, visionary.  Having a properly adjustable seat, height, forward aft, seat back angle, like any respectable recumbent trike for a serious cyclist as oppposed to to those using it as an electric vehicle with pedals, no disrespect to anyone, it's not a luxury, it's an absolute necessity.










11.20.2021

Thanksgiving. There's much I strive to avoid being thankful for.

 It's pretty easy to follow the road or the path unless it is shrouded in dense fog. Or a swirling snow storm. In that way James finds it difficult to avoid being thankful for that which he does not want to be thankful for.

As he remains here in North Carolina his beloved brother making final improvements to this miraculous Creation of his, and as James helps his brother with some projects, there is so much that our sick culture would tell him to be thankful for. His friendship, The Wonder of watching the Brilliance and goodness of this man pour into the vehicle, a profoundly affordable place to do the work, quiet, safe. Systems and routines that are working out really really well, dual sleeping bags for freezing overnight temperatures, instapot recipes and pasta recipes that are providing an extremely affordable, healthy, food supply with very little effort, and sufficiently tasty and varied. Not yet being in the concentration camps that shortly after 2024 are where James is likely to have his life end torturously, still having Social Security and Medicare that will be Stripped Away by the howling Savage GOP WHITE supremacist male-dominated goons.... this miraculous vehicle that is such a powerful tool for reaching the one in a million Souls that can still be reached in this life on this Earth for their life on this Earth and those that they impact. And I could go on and on.


But being thankful is something that shapes one and if one isn't careful, if James isn't careful, his life becomes what he does not want it to be. The above items are ultimately material wealth of one sort or another even though they're totally devoted to the well-being of others, not that which Jesus understood to be creator, the all almighty power that no one will ever be able to name. 

The life of joy is 100% the life of the soul in charge attempting to do good in the world for those in need. And especially and may be entirely, for the profoundly rare soul that can be brought back to the life of joy. 100% of what James wants to be thankful for is in that Realm and nothing outside. 

Why does he care about this? Greed. Greed for joy. Greed for Joy for himself, and the extremely unlikely possibility for what Joy he might help lead others to, or back to.

What he is thankful for are those things that have led him to this path, this understanding, strengthen him for it, and for his attempts to live it and thereby share it. Three individuals that were placed in his life path that for decades he could exercise his capacity for unconditional loving especially as it was almost never requited. The root of it all, his father who is the most unconditionally loving individual James has ever encountered. And thereby James understanding of the life of the man Jesus which James thinks is correct and tragically rare. The genuine loving, not to be confused with selfserving convenient affection or kindness, the genuine loving that throughout his life on rare occasions he is received from this individual here, a teacher early on maybe, several teachers early on, and throughout his life the occasional person that was genuinely loving, that is devoting themself in at least some small way to his well-being and Mission, not their own selfish interests. So encouraging and nurturing.

So what James is thankful for to the exclusion of the above, is the path of serving the neediest from the soul in solidarity, for the joy of it, best articulated and exemplified by the man Jesus, by James biological father Edward, the occasional loving Souls mentioned above. Nothing else, though he appreciates things mentioned above that he is not thankful for and is glad of them, but they're transitory, and not important.



11.08.2021

Anthony Hopkins, wise words. Let go of those that don't love you....

 Saw this on Facebook, do not know that it is authentic, do know that it is correct.



"Wise words from Anthony Hopkins:

′′Let go the people who are not prepared to love you. This is the hardest thing you will have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having hard conversations with people who don't want change.


Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it's a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.


When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn't mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go of the people who aren't ready to accompany you.


If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don't do yourself a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is that you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.


That's what makes it so special when you meet people who reciprocate love. You will know how precious you are.


The more time you spend trying to make yourself loved by someone who is unable to, the more time you waste depriving yourself of the possibility of this connection to someone else.


There are billions of people on this planet and many of them will meet with you at your level of interest and commitment.


The more you stay involved with people who use you as a pillow, a background option or a therapist for emotional healing, the longer you stay away from the community you want.


Maybe if you stop showing up, you won't be wanted. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end. Maybe if you stop texting your phone will stay dark for weeks. That doesn't mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing holding it back was the energy that only you gave to keep it. This is not love, it's attachment. It's wanting to give a chance to those who don't deserve it. You deserve so much, there are people who should not be in your life.


The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy, and both are limited. When you give your time and energy, it will define your existence.


When you realize this, you begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, in activities, places or situations that don't suit you and shouldn't be around you, your energy is stolen.


You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and for everyone around you is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else. Make your life a safe haven, in which only ′′compatible′′ people are allowed.


You are not responsible for saving anyone. You are not responsible for convincing them to improve. It's not your work to exist for people and give your life to them! If you feel bad, if you feel compelled, you will be the root of all your problems, fearing that they will not return the favours you have granted. It's your only obligation to realize that you are the love of your destiny and accept the love you deserve.


Decide that you deserve true friendship, commitment, true and complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Then wait and see how much everything begins to change. Don't waste time with people who are not worth it. Change will give you the love, the esteem, happiness and the protection you deserve.

Really good short ride today. Very encouraging.

 Extremely unlikely to happen if not impossible without them or perpendicular back. Thank you.

This is going to be a nice bike ride, bike ride. Bike ride. Like riding a bike.


Trajectory of the knees. This was huge. Conventional racing bike, the trajectory of the knee area, 3 inch diameter, up and down, conceptually down across the front 224 position of the chain ring . but of course it is different in this recumbent. Tremendously helpful to realize this.


Not throwing the knees James, powering the knees, muscles that are moving are muscles that are contributing energy.


The lower chest is involved in a conventional racing bike pressing in a way that empowers the knees. Same here.


It is recumbent James, not a conventional bike, imagine what you do relative to your knees on a conventional racing bike, and rotate that backwards accordingly.

11.06.2021

James, lol. where are you biking to next once you leave Charlotte?

 


Ryan, current plan is West Coast the southern route. Lots of cold, but I'm hoping that there won't be much snow and ice, or too many other dangerous storms, lots of West headwind some of which are extremely dangerous, but we'll manage I think. Khanh Dam is making some more miraculous improvements including increasing battery capacity by 30%, solar capacity by 30%, so I think at 40 miles a day even in the short winter months will have enough energy even for cooking and some stretches of bad weather. You will recall I carry a thousand watt generator, but those things are so dirty that I like to use that only in an emergency and I think his enhancements may make that possible. And as you may have seen in 2 hours he totally changed the seat arrangements so that I have an adjustable back which can be inclined much more forward and for me it's a absolute game changer. I'm almost certain. After 4 years, 40,000 miles, moving the elf is just like, well, ER, riding a bike. And as to the increased battery and solar, I want this rig  to be seen by the sun trip folks unless I decide somehow impossible, or inappropriate, or unkind. This is a really serious Bridge vehicle and I'd like them to see it, I'm even thinking of finding a way to not get in the way but do some or all of the trip unofficially and that could mean a hundred miles a day at 20 or 30 miles an hour and we might have enough capacity to do that now. We'll see.

Unless Greta Thunberg leads a Global hunger strike of people, led by the Young, to the death if necessary, for a Marshall Plan caliber to rescue some livable future for the children and grandchildren of all Humanity. If so, I'll do what I can to go join that day one.

A monkey wrench in some or all of this is after 70 years of incredibly faithful service by lungs are having a lot of problems. They seem to have developed a hypersensitivity to air pollution. Even when the reports are excellent air quality I spend two hours a day coughing up crud out of my lungs. Been going on for a couple of months now. Having a telemedicine call on Tuesday maybe will shed some light on it.

I never read the book. Did Gatsby ever learb that Daisy was incapable of loving him, or anyone? Poor souls.


 

10.30.2021

Cycling is something your body never forgets. But with James and Sol the opposite has always been true. The problem may have been found.



 Years into the relationship to Sol, James thought he had a revelation when he realized that it is a recumbent. But whatever success was short-lived. James, yes, the vehicle is a recumbent, but it is not a recliner. And James had taken that latter meaning he realized last night and today. After an extremely discouraging ride yesterday, the first in weeks, extremely discouraging, James found himself pondering a lot what's going on with the conventional bicycle. And what he realized was that when one looks for power in a conventional cycle, one might stand and strain up right, but not a racing cyclist, they'll lean forward to an almost 45 degree angle between the Torso and the thigh. For anyone remotely serious about moving this vehicle, I think there is a substantial design flaw. As comfortable as the seat is it's a recliner. So a very short test was extremely encouraging. Rolling up a towel and placing it between the mid and upper spine to help the Torso sit more upright, more at that 45 degree angle, and immediately all this ridiculous destructive painful distracting focus and stress on the knees and the lower legs which is just not there on a conventional bicycle, evaporated. And the attention went to the thighs where the attention should be. Yes, James has had thousands of these junctures. We'll see.




Also, this Witch is James base of operations 24/7 12 months in a year oh, yes, winter, the worst unsolved problem had been the feet. And it seemed that the answer was the only warm cycling boots that clip into the pedals, 450 bucks. But that's four hundred and fifty bucks. Initial tests indicate that the $70 thinsulate boots that shames already had, plus the $30 two-sided cycling pedals, straps on one side, clips for his cycling shoes on the other, is going to do the job. That's big.

10.26.2021

Out of the Woods financially, for now.


James, does that thing have a heater? Sometimes they're referring to the cab, and sometimes the trailer. LOL. It does. Me! And it works when there's enough insulation. Standing Rock, 40 degrees below zero with 70 mile an hour winds, was a real lesson in what is survivable for James. The gigantic problem that has not been solved, his feet. When pedaling. So many things have been tried and last year when traveling from Michigan down to the Gulf Coast January, James attempted to purchase the only cycling boots that have any promise of keeping the feet warm, $450. Lake. There's just nothing else design for cycling that can do the job. Nothing close. But there were none in stock anywhere in the country so it didn't happen. Several weeks ago in anticipating that Khanh is now making this vehicle a true mobile tiny home, with the range and solar collection for many years to come for James, energy storage, and the power, James purchased those boots the way someone else would purchase a furnace for their home. No longer would cold be a major factor inhibiting travel. But $450. And that on top of the other $1,000 worth of expertise work materials Parts components due to Khanh.

Sol is Off the Grid the 6 long spring summer and fall months but not so up until now the late fall winter and early spring months 6 months. We carry a small generator and it can do the job but generators are so horribly polluting. Khanh found incredibly priced top grade durable solar panels to dramatically increase our generation capacity so we can be off grid in the winter too. But with shipping $450 or more. Guess what we just freed up the money for those. How? 

Double sided pedals, one side for the clips to hold the $70 insulated winter hunting boots that James has when needed, and the other side, clipless, for his bicycle shoes used all other times. About 40 bucks. That's less than 450 bucks. LOL.

And, is this wonderful old body gets a bit more frail every day, the time is soon approaching when James can't be depended upon to get the entire payload moving with his legs up steep grades before the motors can help. So $750 was about to be spent on Motors twice as powerful ship from China, but at the last minute we discovered that by using different controllers that we already have the current voters have more than enough. What a great Mercy that was.


Our first project here was to see if some previously used batteries that Khanh had purchased, could provide a 30% increase to current battery capacity to take us through the winter months. It was a big project, tremendous amount of testing, wiring, Etc. And it looked pretty Grim until it wasn't. And through Khanh's Ingenuity and generosity that one third battery increase, one kilowatt, about $200 including the controller, is about one-fifth what James was paying for similar capacity in Lithium-ion. And this new lithium iron phosphate technology is infinitely safer, though 30% heavier.

Sol and I have been rear-ended twice now in the last 3 months. I think some valuable lessons have been learned in terms of additional high intensity flasher placement and I think we're going to be fine going forward, but the last hit destroyed the signage on the left side and damaged it on the rear and structural damage. I've just gotten off the phone with the insurance adjuster and it appears that within a week a suitable settlement for the repairs will be appearing.



To the incredible soul that offered to help in what looked to be a dire financial situation, bless your soul dear sister. But, We're near certainly Out of the Woods for the foreseeable future. This creation by Khan is just a masterpiece in so many ways including vastly improved durability. Incredible generosity on his part he has allowed this his place to be a dry dock for going on 3 weeks now and the vehicle is finally coming to full fruition as a true stable solid reliable four season tiny home base of operation for James work. A godsend.

10.24.2021

"James, You are a prophet in our times... Don't give up hope James", my most sacred of sisters just wrote. James does his best work living without hope.....

 "You are a prophet in our times, James. Our sometimes, very sad times.  I understand . Believe me, I understand.  Don’t give up hope, my most beloved badger friend!  Let me know where to send some cash. Winter is coming!  And there are more of us out there. We get too busy and distracted and fail to watch out for our brother and sister."

She also wrote," you are a mess, but a great and ancient soul." I replied, takes one to know one. She replied, " haha!"

James: Actually, that's really strategically true. Takes one to know one. That's why our work is to be one as intensely as we can because it might reawaken that knowledge, that's soul, in another soul. I absolutely believe that's really our entire work. At least it will give the opportunity for joy to another individual, misery, but Joy, and if many were to wake up in time that's the only way. The rest is details.

Sister: Yep. People need models same as you see JC and Gandhi as models.  You are a model for persistence through thick or thin, rain, sleet or snow. You raised the bar, little badger!

James: Several days before what I thought would be five years in prison for being arrested at Standing Rock, James realized once and for all he has no hope. And every day since then these recent years has reaffirmed that objectively, objectively, in truth, there is no hope. Because there are not a fraction of the people with Souls still alive to use the technology that we have in abundance to save a habitable future for the children and grandchildren. There is no basis for hope.

But there is a basis for devoting every waking breath to the work of attempting to inflame one's own soul and thereby maybe ignite and or protect the soul in another. Why do so? For the joy of it, and the joy it just might restore to another soul. And if there was a way of wakening Hope beyond that, it would be down this exact path.

 And to this she added: "Yep. People need models same as you see JC and Gandhi as models.  You are a model for persistence through thick or thin, rain, sleet or snow. You raised the bar, little badger!" 

James reply: takes one to know one