pic. I'm praying I'll be back conducting the Free Palestine Vigil starting tomorrow. My body and mind have made major progress repairing themsleves from the damage of the cancer in my body and the cancer of evil rulling, and finally destroying, the world, and Palestines. I don't have a body or Spirit I can depend on any more... to much damage... but it feels like I may have the strength for one or more days to keep this, and others, in the faces of visitors to the White House (tomorrow), and the congressscum and their minions that slither back and forth on Capital Hill.

I'm praying I'll be back conducting the Free Palestine Vigil starting tomorrow.  My body and mind have made major progress repairing themsleves from the damage of the cancer in my body and the cancer of evil ruling, and finally destroying, the world, and Palestines.  I don't have a body or Spirit I can depend on any more... to much damage... but it feels like I may have the strength for one or more days to keep this, and others, in the faces of  visitors to the White House (tomorrow), and the congressscum and their minions that slither back and forth on Capital Hill.

May need the ER after-all.....4:45pm Update to my post earlier today about possible 'adhesion' complications from the cancer surgery (note to my docs): Seems I was premature. My stomach remains as disteded as it was last night, not as painful, but pain is rising; it does ache significantly again... not a hint of a bowel movement. Near zero appetite. Unless I hear from you to the contrary...I'll hang on till tomorrow morning (Doc H said go tonight), I'll go to the homeless-health clinic in the morning, and see what they say. [Prior post: http://jesusgodgoodetcnjay.blogspot.com/2015/01/nd-my-doc-and-thought-i-was-headed-to.html ]

May need the ER after-all.....4:45pm Update to my post earlier today about possible 'adhesion' complications from the cancer surgery (note to my docs):  Seems I was premature.  My stomach remains as disteded as it was last night, not as painful, but pain is rising; it does ache significantly again... not a hint of a bowel movement.  Near zero appetite. Unless I hear from you to the contrary...I'll hang on till tomorrow morning (Doc H said go tonight), I'll go to the homeless-health clinic in the morning, and see what they say.  [Prior post: http://jesusgodgoodetcnjay.blogspot.com/2015/01/nd-my-doc-and-thought-i-was-headed-to.html  ]

nd. My doc and thought I was headed to the ER today. I had a total blockage of my digestive trac judging by the symptoms since last night. Saw the doc at 8am today who said, 'get ready to go to the ER by tonight.' Huge abdominal distending, and pain, since last evening, worse by morning, little sleep last night. I was resting at 9:30 am on the only side I could bear to be on... and like a switch was being thrown... I felt the blockage cease, I think. Doc thinks with all the cancer surgeries I'm prone to adhesions. Looks promising for the last few hours. Fingers crossed... well... fingers typing... now that the pain has subsided enough.

My doc and thought I was headed to the ER today.  I had a total blockage of my digestive trac judging by the symptoms since last night.  Saw the doc at 8am today who said, 'get ready to go to the ER by tonight.'  Huge abdominal distending, and pain, since last evening, worse by morning, little sleep last night. I was resting at 9:30 am on the only side I could bear to be on... and like a switch was being thrown... I felt the blockage cease, I think.  Doc thinks with all the cancer surgeries I'm prone to adhesions.  Looks promising for the last few hours.  Fingers crossed... well... fingers typing... now that the pain has subsided enough.

Cancer Update: No biopsy (results) yet. 23rd I go for another full body CT scan... to see if they got the tumor, I guess. I sign a relaese then for them to get a 'molecular' biopsy scan of the tumor.

Cancer Update:  No biopsy (results) yet.  23rd I go for another full body CT scan... to see if they got the tumor, I guess. I sign a relaese then for them to get a 'molecular' biopsy scan of the tumor.

nd. I'm fine, regaining strength... moving back toward less obscene levels of sleep required... expecting to have the strength for Capital Hill next week when the Congressscum ooozes back into town. Using what waking moments I have in the meantime to fight to Free Palestine online, and deeper study to gain further strength for the war.

 I'm fine, regaining strength... moving back toward less obscene levels of sleep required... expecting to have the strength for Capital Hill next week when the Congressscum ooozes back into town.  Using what waking moments I have in the meantime to fight to Free Palestine online, and deeper study to gain further strength for the war.

nd. Another 14-16 hours of sleep again today. WTF?

nd. Another 14-16 hours of sleep again today.  WTF?

nd. The side where the tumor was removed is still very very very sore to the touch... but I think last night may have been a turning point. I've accepted three days of insane amounts of sleep... and it feels like things are on the mend now. Am praying to be in front of the WH Sat and Sun, weather permitting, and have some hope my body will cooperate this time. I have no complaints - my body has done much more for me than I've had any right to expect - but it is still hard to deal with its ever increasing limits.

The side where the tumor was removed is still very very very sore to the touch... but I think last night may have been a turning point.  I've accepted three days of insane amounts of sleep... and it feels like things are on the mend now.  Am praying to be in front of the WH Sat and Sun, weather permitting, and have some hope my body will cooperate this time. I have no complaints - my body has done much more for me than I've had any right to expect - but it is still hard to deal with its ever increasing limits.

nd. "Oh you poor dear!" Said my primary care doc A. C. She had just pealed back my bandages that only med techs had seen on prior visits. A graduate of Georgetown U she devotes her life to we poor, and a 'vacation' for her is going to Haiti to help the poor there. I went in to the clinic, AGAIN, this morning, because the blisters from my allergic reaction to adhesive tape... hurt like hell, and are not healing... just ooooooozing. I felt like a real baby. Her words were soooo comforting, and seemed, convincing. There is quite a bit of raw red meat showing. For the first time, I was kept awake quite a while last night with pain at the surgical site... that 36 block round trip hike to the WH Free Palestine vigil lugging all my stuff... may have hurt things, a bit. Doc C re-dressed my wounds and suggested I come back to do it again each of the next two days, which I'll do, if needed. Not much foot traffic in DC this week for the vigil, and the weather is rain. I'm hoping that Thursday will be clear enough that I can vigil to Free Palestine all day the 25th north side of the WH. We'll see.

?

nd. No vigil a the White House today. I've become totally allergic to surgical tape of any kind, it seems. The great pain that began yesterday... was huge blisters growing under the tape. Went to the homeless clinic and they put big gauze bandages on me and a 10" wide ace bandage like thing wrapped all the way around my chest several times to hold the dressings in place. Feels mmmmuuuuuccccchhhhhh better. Still weak, but now with some slight hope of resuming the White House Free Palestine vigil tomorrow.

No vigil at the White House today.  I've become totally allergic to surgical tape of any kind, it seems.  The great pain that began yesterday... was huge blisters growing under the tape.  Went to the homeless clinic and they put big gauze bandages on me and a 10" wide ace bandage like thing wrapped all the way around my chest several times to hold the dressings in place.  Feels mmmmuuuuuccccchhhhhh better.  Still weak, but now with some slight hope of resuming the White House Free Palestine vigil tomorrow.

nd. No biopsy results yet on monday's tumor removal. I've had a pretty easy time of it since then... except for a night of hellish constipation. And my skin is badly allergic to the clear tape being used these days - my skin painfully blisters - big blisters! I hope to have enough strength to be in front of the White House this weekend Sat and Sun. I expect to be, tho against the doctors orders. Palestine has no time for us to wait.

No biopsy results yet on monday's tumor removal.  I've had a pretty easy time of it since then... except for a night of hellish constipation.  And my skin is badly allergic to the clear tape being used these days - my skin painfully blisters - big blisters!  I hope to have enough strength to be in front of the White House this weekend Sat and Sun.  I expect to be, tho against the doctors orders.  Palestine has no time for us to wait.

nd. Surgery update: Basically fine - tired, sore, sleeping more than normal. but quite functional EXCEPT my skin is not terribly allergic to one or two types of surgical tape! Blisters, hurts and stings a lot! I thought it was just the clear stuff they use now, but went to the clinic today, they changed it to a more traditional tape that seems to be doing more of the same! Huh? No word yet on the biopsy.

nd. Surgery update:  Basically fine - tired, sore, sleeping more than normal. but quite functional EXCEPT my skin is not terribly allergic to one or two types of surgical tape!  Blisters, hurts and stings a lot!  I thought it was just the clear stuff they use now, but went to the clinic today, they changed it to a more traditional tape that seems to be doing more of the same!  Huh?  No word yet on the biopsy.

detail. Cancer update: 1. Pain is... (detail click link)

Cancer update:  1.  Pain is moderate from Monday's surgery to remove a tumor from my chest, and the pain meds manage that well; 2. I'm sleeping about 75% of the time; 3.  Extreme constipation from the pain meds - after last night, I DO have some idea of what giving birth feels like - truly; proving at the same time that I don't have any active aneurisms or a propensity to stroke yet  :-)  :-(  . It was hell. Went to the homeless clinic today for meds for that; 4. The surgeon will call me back to a meeting within 2 weeks when the biopsy results come back; 5. I'm scheduled to meet with my oncologist in February; 6. Not supposed to lift more than 15 pounds the next 30 days, and I carry 2 to 3 times that to and from the White House Vigil 18 blocks each way... so that and weather may, MAY, slow my on-site activism down for a while... we'll see.

nd. With just a little luck I'll be going to Cathy's in PA till next monday... need a 'note' from the hospital, an early enough departure so Cathy can get back to a late afternoon obligation, and a 'release' from CCNV, all of which appears likely. Means I'll not be able to do the Vigil at the WH this weekend... but I'll be gathering strength for the fight upon my return to DC. Will know by mid day tomorrow.

With just a little luck I'll  be going to Cathy's in PA till next monday... need a 'note' from the hospital, an early enough departure so Cathy can get back to a late afternoon obligation, and a 'release' from CCNV, all of which appears likely. Means I'll not  be able to do the Vigil at the WH this weekend...  but I'll be gathering strength for the fight upon my return to DC.  Will know by mid day tomorrow.

detail. Surgery was a success. 3 hour operation began at 11am, I was... (detail click link)

Surgery was a success.  3 hour operation  began at 11am, I was waking in Recovery by 4:30pm and in my room by 6pm.  Little pain when I am stationary, huge pain if I cough (rarely occurring), they've prescribed pain meds that seem to manage that well, too.

Great, kind, compassionate, attentive, responsive, highly trained medical team.  Thanks to Obamacare it is available to me.  

Had one of the six  or so nicest surprises of my life today, that I can remember (so profoundly and deeply sorry to any of you that have been so deeply kind to me whose extreme kindness I may be forgetting at this moment, but I'm particularly overwhelmed by this one).   Please blame it on the pain narcotics they are pumping into me.

The five others, in no particular order: 

* 55year old Gerry and early 20’s John, in their suburban neighborhood, running hugely loud power tools on the lawn, till 2am... cutting me a hugely heavy  Cross... for me to walk with 200 miles to DC... to raise action to Save Darfur;

* Beverly nearly 'ripping the throat' out of a pastor she saw should try and rescue me from an extreme hike, while on hunger strike, ‘the most ‘Christian thing she’d every seen’) for the criminally disadvantaged children of Chester PA;

*  Dave and Mary Rachel bringing their new young son X from PA (where they work 7 days per week) to see me when I was living on the streets of DC so I could devote myself to averting global warming;

*  Cathy driving from PA, just moments before hurricane Sandy was to hit DC where I was living on the streets fighting Global Warming... to rip me off of them, to safety, braving the leadinng edge of Sandy all the way back to PA for me, with me; 

* My dad... for the 28 years or so before his death... standing by me, giving me everything he had to give... despite the near total, embarrasing, zero of a person I objectively was at that time....

Oh, I could go on with another 5, or more.  Most people never see such Love even once in their Lives... I've been criminally, entirely, undeservedly over-privileged in this (and every other ) way.  

[Side note: It is important, crucial... to periodically reflect such instances of Pure Loving in one's life, and or, such instances one knows of, even if in literature... for THIS is where we've seen God, the Creator, the Divine... Loving... and they must be the Star we steer by to be, become, and do the same... with every breath.]

The potential of my physical death has never been a concern for me, except as a provider to physical dependents (offspring, woman I was married to), and now, as a possibly consequential fighter for my Family in Palestine.  But personally, hey, you go to sleep, don't wake up, the ride, your 'turn,' is over.  What is the big deal?  So the tiny but real risk of death from any substantial surgery, such as mine this morning, was no concern to me. 

Cathy, my sister in Pennsylvania, to whom I was married for decades, offered, weeks ago, to come down, and I knew she wanted to, and it was from her heart I was sure... but I said the idea was ridiculous... bus picks up and drops me off literally at the curb... of the hospital and my homeless shelter... no, I said... too much time, too much money... too much carbon... zero point or need. And that was the end of it.  Didn't hear from her since... our lives are in near totally different directions.  

Signing in at the hospital this morning I gave Cathy’s  name and my friend Jim from VA, authorization to retreaive my stuff, in the uunlikely event I croaked  (with prior instructions to them that what meager 'stuff' I have go to the world's greatest activist Diane Wilson for her work)  But to the question 'is anyone here with you?,’ and ‘who to call in case of a problem?,’ 'no one' was my reply, as always, with which I was 1000000000000% at peace.  I hate resouces going in my direction… the purpose of my life is to get Loving resources flowing to my Neediest Family for Chists sak!  I was asked the same questions, and gave the same reply when I was in final prep, just seconds  before being sedated and put under for this 3 hour operation.  'No one,' and 'no,’ answers that are such a non issue to me, so habitual for so many years now… I gave them no thought whatsoever.

Three hours later, after what seemed like 30 minutes tops to me, I was in recovery waking up, "Your ex-wife (I hate the term) Cathy is here when you are up to see her."  I'm having trouble seeing the screen, and typing, as the sobs of wonder, Joy, amazement, warmth... come back to me, many hours later, as I type this to you.  I don't recall ever, ever, ever being so overwhelmed with such a Loving act, incomprehensible… Divine.

'I wasn't sure you would be 'ok' with me coming, she said, but I needed to be here, and if upon seeing you you wanted me to leave... I was 100% prepared for that... but I needed to be here.'(and return on the six hour round trip drive).

pic. How much of your life, the stuff in your life, would continue if the exploitation of all the world's poor... ended? Not much. Your life depends on the suffering of others, as did mine. You ok with that? White House Free Palestine Vigil, 12/14/14 [Note: I’ll be away from the fight for a while... my next cancer surgery is tomorrow, 11am.]

How much of your life, the stuff in your life, would continue if the exploitation of all the world's poor... ended?  Not much. Your life depends on the suffering of others, as did mine. You ok with that?

White House Free Palestine Vigil, 12/14/14

[Note: I’ll be away from the fight for a while... my next cancer surgery is
tomorrow, 11am.]

pic. Updates: 1. Tumor found in my lung last week... to be removed Dec 15, inpatient, 1-2 days recovery in hospital; 2. As I type this I'm on Capital (sp) Hill as I was yesterday and will be the 3 days the congress creatures will be in town next week... weather and health permitting... brrrrrrrrr (not that cold stops me, it does not, sssooooofffffaaaarrrrrr; but rain (expected Saturday, does); 3. Funds for wifi that I use when on-location like I am now... funds are down to less than 2 months. Those of you who give at holiday times may want to support the work I do to Free Palestine. Paypal at start_loving at yahoo dot com works; best if you let me know to look for it... if you do. Every penny, every breath, every resource at my disposal goes 100% (not 99.999999%) 100% to work to free my, our, family in Palestine. I keep looking for the best possible deal on wifi in DC... it is what I have, by far... $40 per month unlimited gb... I don't have or use, or afford... a phone. (Yes, that makes me the only one in the US). I'm functioning mentally, and physically, and Spiritually at an extremely high level these months... so I'd HATE to be off line due to lack of wifi funds... while I am such an effective fighter for Palestine. None of us knows how much time we have... to serve. Must strike while the iron is hot. Feel free to share this with those you think might want to know. Please visit, subscribe to (daily, anonymous summary), share... this blog I maintain http://jesusgodgoodetcnjay.blogspot.com/

Updates:  1. Tumor found in my lung last week... to be removed Dec 15, inpatient, 1-2 days recovery in hospital; 2.  As I type this I'm on Capital (sp) Hill as I was yesterday and will be the 3 days the congress creatures will be in town next week... weather and health permitting... brrrrrrrrr (not that cold stops me, it does not, sssooooofffffaaaarrrrrr; but rain (expected Saturday, does); 3. Funds for wifi that I use when on-location like I am now... funds are down to less than 2 months.  Those of you who give at holiday times may want to support the work I do to Free Palestine. Paypal at start_loving at yahoo dot com works; best if you let me know to look for it... if you do.  Every penny, every breath, every resource at my disposal goes 100% (not 99.999999%) 100% to work to free my, our, family in Palestine.  I keep looking for the best possible deal on wifi in DC... it is what I have, by far... $40 per month unlimited gb... I don't have or use, or afford... a phone.  (Yes, that makes me the only one in the US).  I'm functioning mentally, and physically, and Spiritually at an extremely high level these months... so I'd HATE to be off line due to lack of wifi funds... while I am such an effective fighter for Palestine.  None of us knows how much time we have... to serve.  Must strike while the iron is hot.   Feel free to share this with those you think might want to know.  Please visit, subscribe to (daily, anonymous summary), share... this blog I maintain http://jesusgodgoodetcnjay.blogspot.com/

detail. followup. On my 13 month cancer scan last week they found that a spot in my lung they have been watching for a couple of years is growing. I'm headed to the hospital for a pre-op consultation, whatever that means. Oh, lol, I did not know there was a spot on my lungs, & I did not know they were watching it. I wonder if this is payback time for the carton of cigarettes that an elementary school friend of mine and I stole from a drug store and smoked in one afternoon.

On my 13 month cancer scan last week they found that a spot in my lung they have been watching for a couple of years is growing. I'm headed to the hospital for a pre-op consultation, whatever that means. Oh, lol, I did not know there was a spot on my lungs, & I did not know they were watching it. I wonder if this is payback time for the carton of cigarettes that an elementary school friend of mine and I stole from a drug store and smoked in one afternoon.

.... now on the bus back from the hostpital:

*  They think it likely it is more of my colon cancer... in the lung now. 

*  Wise to take it out now... so I will.  Three small incisions, they insert a camera, find it, snip it out.  Tentatively scheduled for the 15th... after congress goes back to their holes... I don't want to miss time expressing my contempt for them on the hill this week and next.  And I hate the holidays... our time of special worship of our addiction to stuff... we over-privileged.

*  Over night in hosp recovering... maybe 2 nd nite.

*  The liver DOES NOT GROW BACK!  Huh?  She showed me on the scan... the big cavaty, now filled with bowel... where the liver DOES NOT GROW BACK!  LOL. Communication is NOT the strong suit of these folks.

nd. I go in for a pre-op consultation on Tuesday regarding the growth in my lung, detected in last week's cancer scan.

I go in for a pre-op consultation on Tuesday regarding the growth in my lung, detected in last week's cancer scan.

nd. My cancer visit to Georgetown Hospital today: This is my 1st full body ct scan in about 10 months - was to happen in Feb, but the city gov had screwed up my insurance... and then I got caught up in lobbying congress for Palestine... so today, 9 months late, is when the scan occurred. From the results... My doc doesn't seem worried, but she, just this time, said they are following a growth in my lung, for several years now. LOL. 1st I've heard of it. It is growing, that is not a good sign. It is small, and has not doubled in size in 18 months, that's a good sign. She is concerned enough that she is referring it to a chest doctor to see what she thinks. My bloodwork was not back yet so I don't know if my blood is still negative for the cancer marker. I'm not concerned, at all, except my body is functioning extremely well, and my mind is functioning extremely well, and although I was not 'alive' and 'awake' for the great moral struggles of anti-Vietnam War, Civil Rights, anti-Apartheid SA, I AM AWAKE AND ALIVE for what is the most difinitive such battle for all of human future - anti-Zionist (US Christian, and Israeli) Extermination of Palestines. And it would be such a waste, so sad, if I am taken out of that battle now, especially all the hundreds of thousands in medical bills to get me this far. Personally, I'm ready to go home, but my strong preference is to be left here to fight for as long as I am fully functioning, and can help, as I am now.

My cancer visit to Georgetown Hospital today:  This is my 1st full body ct scan in about 10 months - was to happen in Feb, but the city gov had screwed up my insurance... and then I got caught up in lobbying congress for Palestine... so today, 9 months late, is when the scan occurred.  From the results... My doc doesn't seem worried, but she, just this time, said they are following a growth in my lung, for several years now.  LOL.  1st I've heard of it.  It is growing, that is not a good sign. It is small, and has not doubled in size in 18 months, that's a good sign.  She is concerned enough that she is referring it to a chest doctor to see what she thinks.  My bloodwork was not back yet so I don't know if my blood is still negative for the cancer marker.  I'm not concerned, at all, except my body is functioning extremely well, and my mind is functioning extremely well, and although I was not 'alive' and 'awake' for the great moral struggles of anti-Vietnam War, Civil Rights, anti-Apartheid SA, I AM AWAKE AND ALIVE for what is the most difinitive such battle for all of human future - anti-Zionist (US Christian, and Israeli) Extermination of Palestines.  And it would be such a waste, so sad, if I am taken out of that battle now, especially all the hundreds of thousands in medical bills to get me this far.  Personally, I'm ready to go home, but my strong preference is to be left here to fight for as long as I am fully functioning, and can help, as I am now.

nd. Some of you will recall that I did not wish to survive the cancer operation of a year ago. I did not want to. I so hate the world, the country, we've made - the ruin, the evil, the consummate self-centeredness, the greed, the prevailing unloving, the near total absence of Truth, the religious Affloholism.... Hunger Games, Elysium... are NOT future dystopias... they are Today. But I survived... and now I am glad I did... because otherwise I would not be here to fight the greatest evil in my lifetime - the total corruption of America (Government and Citizenry) by the Zionis... to Instrumentally Enable the Genocide of our Age... the HOLOCAUST of our Age - the Savage, Brutal, Cruel, Sadistic, Horrific... Extermination of Palestines - VIRTUALLY 100% PAID FOR, SUPPORTED, WEAPONIZED... BY WE NICE, F'ING, CHR-STAIN AMERICANS.. Such evil was totally INCONCEIVABLE TO ME. BUT... HERE IT IS. And I'm Glad I'm here to give the fight my every breath.

Some of you will recall that I did not wish to survive the cancer operation of a year ago.  I did not want to.  I so hate the world, the country, we've made - the ruin, the evil, the consummate self-centeredness, the greed, the prevailing unloving, the near total absence of Truth, the religious Affloholism....  Hunger Games, Elysium... are NOT future dystopias... they are Today.  But I survived... and now I am glad I did... because otherwise I would not be here to fight the greatest evil in my lifetime - the total corruption of America (Government and Citizenry) by the Zionis... to Instrumentally Enable the Genocide of our Age... the HOLOCAUST of our Age - the Savage, Brutal, Cruel, Sadistic, Horrific... Extermination of Palestines - VIRTUALLY 100% PAID FOR, SUPPORTED, WEAPONIZED... BY WE NICE, F'ING, CHR-STAIN AMERICANS..  Such evil was totally INCONCEIVABLE TO ME.  BUT... HERE IT IS.  And I'm Glad I'm here to give the fight my every breath.